I thought I would take the time to write today, since I haven't written in a while. This is what happens when my life turns into a tornado lol. I love being busy - most of what I'm busy with is the volunteering that I do through my church, which is fun.
I'm learning that I can learn new things without having to be perfect. I can be human and make mistakes and learn from them.
This weekend, we had a conference (I'm not sure that you could call it a conference, but that's what I'm going to call it for now) called Kairos. Kairos is a meeting between you and God. Our time is filled with praise and worship, teaching and prayer. It is inviting God to come down and bless us with His presence.
I got a call for this about 3 weeks ago to do graphics. Let me tell you, I was excited! For those of you who don't know what graphics are, they are the words that go up on the screen when we sing our songs. It's the background, the power point presentations etc. I love it because it gives me a chance to see praise and worship from a completely different perspective.
I love music. Anything to do with music and I have probably done it at some point in my life. Music was one of my outlets when I was in school. I played in band in school and joined the choir at church - I remember when it was still small lol! Music was and still is one of the ways that God ministers to me the most.
You know it's powerful when the sound team starts getting choked up and tears well up in our eyes. God just has a way of touching you wherever you are when you invite Him in through praise and worship.
The last week has been tough on me - but I've never lost my faith. God has been teaching me that I need more discipline and self control in my life - and I agree. My problem is is that my flesh doesn't want to submit to that. So I war with myself in my thoughts and the struggle becomes too much at some point and I just give in.
So, in order to have balance in this area of my life, I have been slowly pulling in people who are going to not only hold me accountable, but will have an impact in my life in the long run.
Not only that, but I have been pressing in to God through reading my bible, prayer and praise and worship.
The misconception that a lot of people have, and that I used to have, is that when you and God get down to the nitty gritty, they're going to feel something afterwards. This weekend wasn't about feeling for me. Just the opposite in fact. It was learning to trust God even when I didn't feel any different. And it was believing that He had done a great work in me regardless of how I felt.
Many Christians think that God is a "feel good" god. Tell me, where in the Bible does it say that? I have searched the Scriptures diligently and still haven't found that verse. So I am learning to live my life the way that God wants me to....not whether I "feel" like it or not.
Now, I am not saying that feelings aren't ever involved. I am saying that there are times that God gets us to a point in our lives where we have to rely fully on Him instead of what we feel. Personally, it's a test for me and I'll tell you why.
For years I based my relationship with God on the "good works" that I did and the "feeling" I got from being at church. Most of that feeling time took place during praise and worship. So, if life was so good, then why did I fall away when times got tough?
Because my house was built upon the sand instead of the Rock. When the storms came, my good works and feelings didn't stand up to the wind and rain. They tore up my "house" and left me in pieces once more.
So during my 20's, I struggled with being at the church for a couple of years and then falling away. So what's different now?
The difference between the person I am today and the person that I was when I was 25 is where I have my identity. It is that simple. You see, my whole life, people have placed expectations on me. I grew up in a performance based home. I was only accepted if I did everything perfect.
The problem was and still is, that I am not perfect. God is working upon that perfection in my life, but believe me when I say that I am far from being perfect anytime soon! So unless Jesus comes back, I just need to work through the things that God is dealing with me on.
The real change was when I figured out that I was putting my identity and my faith in people - who will always fail me at some point in their lives. When the blinders fell off and I started seeing God in me and all around me instead of high in the sky, it was a paradigm shift of the highest magnitude for me. My world literally went from a slant to straight.
I believe that in that moment, God changed my life forever. There is no going back for me - there is only moving forward. Is my life perfect? Not by any means. But life for me is more rewarding than it ever has been.
My faith in God has grown. I've learned to depend on Him totally - the way that I did with people and failed miserably - and He hasn't failed me yet. My trust, my love and my focus is solely and completely on Him. I have a true desire to get to know Him more, to find out the promises that He has for me, to talk to Him, to just be with Him.
I think about God from the first moment I wake up until the last thought that I remember when my head hits the pillow. The song 'Dance With Me' by Jesus Culture has stuck with me lately. I have it on repeat in my car and you would think that I would get sick of listening to the same song over and over again. But to be honest, it has become the cry of my heart. Listen....
'Won't you dance with me, O Lover of my soul, to the song of all songs.
Romance me, O Lover of my soul, to the song of all songs.
Behold, You have come, over the hills, up on the mountain.
To me You will run, My Beloved, You have captured my heart.
With You I will go, You are my love, You are my fair one.
The winter has passed, and the spring time has come'
I'm learning that I can learn new things without having to be perfect. I can be human and make mistakes and learn from them.
This weekend, we had a conference (I'm not sure that you could call it a conference, but that's what I'm going to call it for now) called Kairos. Kairos is a meeting between you and God. Our time is filled with praise and worship, teaching and prayer. It is inviting God to come down and bless us with His presence.
I got a call for this about 3 weeks ago to do graphics. Let me tell you, I was excited! For those of you who don't know what graphics are, they are the words that go up on the screen when we sing our songs. It's the background, the power point presentations etc. I love it because it gives me a chance to see praise and worship from a completely different perspective.
I love music. Anything to do with music and I have probably done it at some point in my life. Music was one of my outlets when I was in school. I played in band in school and joined the choir at church - I remember when it was still small lol! Music was and still is one of the ways that God ministers to me the most.
You know it's powerful when the sound team starts getting choked up and tears well up in our eyes. God just has a way of touching you wherever you are when you invite Him in through praise and worship.
The last week has been tough on me - but I've never lost my faith. God has been teaching me that I need more discipline and self control in my life - and I agree. My problem is is that my flesh doesn't want to submit to that. So I war with myself in my thoughts and the struggle becomes too much at some point and I just give in.
So, in order to have balance in this area of my life, I have been slowly pulling in people who are going to not only hold me accountable, but will have an impact in my life in the long run.
Not only that, but I have been pressing in to God through reading my bible, prayer and praise and worship.
The misconception that a lot of people have, and that I used to have, is that when you and God get down to the nitty gritty, they're going to feel something afterwards. This weekend wasn't about feeling for me. Just the opposite in fact. It was learning to trust God even when I didn't feel any different. And it was believing that He had done a great work in me regardless of how I felt.
Many Christians think that God is a "feel good" god. Tell me, where in the Bible does it say that? I have searched the Scriptures diligently and still haven't found that verse. So I am learning to live my life the way that God wants me to....not whether I "feel" like it or not.
Now, I am not saying that feelings aren't ever involved. I am saying that there are times that God gets us to a point in our lives where we have to rely fully on Him instead of what we feel. Personally, it's a test for me and I'll tell you why.
For years I based my relationship with God on the "good works" that I did and the "feeling" I got from being at church. Most of that feeling time took place during praise and worship. So, if life was so good, then why did I fall away when times got tough?
Because my house was built upon the sand instead of the Rock. When the storms came, my good works and feelings didn't stand up to the wind and rain. They tore up my "house" and left me in pieces once more.
So during my 20's, I struggled with being at the church for a couple of years and then falling away. So what's different now?
The difference between the person I am today and the person that I was when I was 25 is where I have my identity. It is that simple. You see, my whole life, people have placed expectations on me. I grew up in a performance based home. I was only accepted if I did everything perfect.
The problem was and still is, that I am not perfect. God is working upon that perfection in my life, but believe me when I say that I am far from being perfect anytime soon! So unless Jesus comes back, I just need to work through the things that God is dealing with me on.
The real change was when I figured out that I was putting my identity and my faith in people - who will always fail me at some point in their lives. When the blinders fell off and I started seeing God in me and all around me instead of high in the sky, it was a paradigm shift of the highest magnitude for me. My world literally went from a slant to straight.
I believe that in that moment, God changed my life forever. There is no going back for me - there is only moving forward. Is my life perfect? Not by any means. But life for me is more rewarding than it ever has been.
My faith in God has grown. I've learned to depend on Him totally - the way that I did with people and failed miserably - and He hasn't failed me yet. My trust, my love and my focus is solely and completely on Him. I have a true desire to get to know Him more, to find out the promises that He has for me, to talk to Him, to just be with Him.
I think about God from the first moment I wake up until the last thought that I remember when my head hits the pillow. The song 'Dance With Me' by Jesus Culture has stuck with me lately. I have it on repeat in my car and you would think that I would get sick of listening to the same song over and over again. But to be honest, it has become the cry of my heart. Listen....
'Won't you dance with me, O Lover of my soul, to the song of all songs.
Romance me, O Lover of my soul, to the song of all songs.
Behold, You have come, over the hills, up on the mountain.
To me You will run, My Beloved, You have captured my heart.
With You I will go, You are my love, You are my fair one.
The winter has passed, and the spring time has come'
I hope you all enjoy :) Have a blessed day
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